To the Man Who Helped Me Find Myself Again

Image by ​@christianariversphoto

---

To the Man Who Helped Me Find Myself Again

I was lost for so long. I didn’t believe in myself or who I wanted to be. I felt worthless and insecure. I just stopped caring. Nothing felt worth it anymore. Day by day passed by. Minute by minute dragged on. Then you walked back into my life like a breath of fresh air. You consumed me and pushed me to be a better me. You showed me how to be confident in myself, and most importantly, you taught me that I was worthy and loveable.

We talked on the phone for hours, laughing so much I was crying. Every time I heard your voice, it would send shivers down my spine. You did that to me. I thought you were my forever. You made me happy. I didn’t think happiness like that existed. You gave me my smile back, and for that, I will always be grateful.

Sadly, not all love stories are happily ever afters. And ours surely wasn’t. All good things come with a price. That price was difficult to endure: we just weren’t meant to be.

Just because we weren’t meant to be, doesn’t mean you won’t eternally have a special place in my heart, because you came into my life and helped me when I needed it the most.

​So here is the hardest part, the goodbye. I don’t want to let you go, but I know I have to. This isn’t easy for me and I will miss you everyday. But, you broke my heart and there is just no way to repair what you did. Just know that I loved you with every part of my being. I hope life brings you everything you want, because even though you put up a tough persona, you’re a good person who deserves to find your happiness.

​
—Author Olivia Howe